Wouldn’t We All Like To?

From the DP: “Authorities dug up the hot dog near the Cedar Hill Mobile Home Park, where they discovered he had lost…his bottles of ketchup and mustard, with which he was slathering himself so he could appear more delicious.”

6 thoughts on “Wouldn’t We All Like To?”

  1. The DP has really been writing some great headlines lately: Arrest Made in Hotdog’s Abduction.

    Does anyone know why the kidnappers broke off the wiener’s arms and condiments? That seems awfully extreme…

  2. Well the use of ketchup on hot dogs is so wrong that this crime may, in fact, be justifiable.

    Also Victoria “broke off the wiener’s arm and condiments” just made me giggle

  3. You’d have to do more than simply dress up wieners in condiments to make them appetizing.

  4. I love, LOVE, old-school creepy cartoon restaurant mascots. Almost put an eBay bid in on an enormous Bob’s Big Boy statue for my yard once. Perhaps glad I didn’t in light of this recent crime.

    Perlogik, although I also detest ketchup on my ‘dogs, I defend this wiener’s right to slather himself with the condiments of his choice.

    But hey, when did the DP grow a sense of humor?

  5. If you were a hot dog, and you were starving, would you eat yourself?…I’d smother myself with brown mustard and relish. I’d be so delicious!

    (Am I the only one who immediately thought of Will Ferrell’s Harry Caray impression? Video here.)

  6. Mustard, onions, ketchup, relish, topped with a little slaw, chili and kraut.

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